February 2012
94 posts
2 tags
growing up | Lullatone [x]
A while back I was talking to a girl on compassionpit who wanted to kill herself and I helped her find a psychiatrist in her area and convinced her to make an appointment and we conversed over email quite a few times but then I got busy and forgot to check my email for a month and I’ve sent her multiple emails and haven’t heard back and I’m worried about her. And I worry about...
1 tag
“I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way (s)he handles...”
– Maya Angelou
1 tag
Guess who got a job today?
Drowning my sorrows in berry pie and Elliott Smith. (Not so) patiently awaiting Spring.
1 tag
Waiting | City and Colour
There weren’t any flowers at the park, but there was a big “fuck you” scrawled across the slide I used to play on as a child and the rust of the chainlink stained my hands as I pumped my legs back and forth on the only swings in town untouched by lawsuits and safety complaints and for a fleeting moment I felt young again. And I saw my old neighbor, the one I sold koolaid with on...
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Tomorrow I'm going to
pick flowers
bake a pie
give it to someone
learn a new song on piano
lay in the grass even though it feels like winter
READ
tell someone I don’t know how wonderful they are
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Amy Hit the Atmosphere | Counting Crows
2 tags
It’s hard because you spend all of your time trying so hard to find things that give you joy when the things that destroy you inside find you on their own, they hear your laugh from miles away like that one twig you didn’t mean to step on in the forest and they swarm around you and breathe down your neck and you think you’ll never smile again. And it’s like, you spend the...
1 tag
Luckily for me, the Spanish family next door is having their bi-weekly massive get together so every few minutes I hear an abrupt “YEAHHHHwoooooAHH” and I’ve nearly peed myself every time.
Sometimes I get a really strong urge to dial up random numbers from the phone book and ask the person on the other end how they are and what their day was like and to reassure them that they are great people but then I remember how these days everyone assumes you’re out to hurt them if you’re nice just to be nice so I go on drinking my hot cocoa in silence.
1 tag
-one time I went to magic camp and learned to juggle
-I throw up on 85% of long drives but I like them anyways
-I’ve only been to Disneyland once and the only thing I remember is crying on the indiana Jones ride and riding in a caterpillar
-I’ve never kissed a boy or eaten a hamburger
-I used to live for the nights when my brother would let me “sleep over” on his floor...
“Happy. Just in my swim shorts, barefooted, wild-haired, in the red fire dark,...”
– Jack Kerouac
Going to bed before 10 I’d be really excited if I wasn’t so sad and worried
gublernation:
for the last 2 weeks sleep has been more like an old schoolmate I occasionally bump into but don’t really keep in touch with
2 tags
Nightcall | Kavinsky
I wonder if the nervous girl in the gold car felt my heart cartwheel behind my ribs as she sped through the red light towards me and if the boy in the passenger seat with the vacant eyes loves her and if she loves him back and if anyone would have visited her in the hospital if my foot didn’t grip the breaks hard enough
I wonder if Heather at the clothing shop is as happy as her bright...
I save up the times our knees touch but don’t mean to and the way my name sounds ten times better as it’s leaving your lips and I save up your kindness and our whispered conversations from the back of the room and I stitch them all together and pretend they’re something. Something real.
“One day you fall for this boy. And he touches you with his fingers. And he burns...”
– The Tracey Fragments
